NO MEANS NO! DAMMIT!
Ok, so you realize you have a crush. Great! Now, it’s time to find out if your newfound potential love interest is interested in you. That means put on your thinking cap, get your game face on, and pitch your sexy in their direction. There will be a lot of nail-biting while you wait to see what happens next.
Ok, so they responded right back to you with slick, sexy talk. That’s awesome; unless of course your “Boo” talks to EVERYONE like that. Still, don’t let this slow you down, at first. You still need to know what the deal is; so, turn up the pursuit, step on the gas, and speed up.
Ok. You’re a little confused. You took it up another level and “that person you’ve been waiting for all of your life” didn’t bite. They’re still friendly and obviously flattered by your interest in them, but they didn’t return the compliments with the same intensity as the ones you shot in their direction. In fact, their reaction to your advances were somewhat, Wow—just wow!
Ok. You can’t give up this easily. I mean, this is the person put on this earth, delivered into your life to solve all of your self-esteem issues, love you like you’ve always wanted to be loved, and rescue you from all of your suffering. You deserve this. Why shouldn’t it—why couldn’t it—be you who they choose?
So, now you go all out. You’re tired of the innocent, playful flirtation. You want more—right now! You don’t pull any punches, and express what you want bluntly so that there can be no confusion. Then, there’s a pause—Oh NO!
NO, they’re not with whatever you want from them. They give a polite excuse to basically ease you down gently. That’s not enough for you. You don’t believe them and in the back of your mind, you just know that you can somehow make them feel differently about you. You ask more questions than you’re supposed to, trying to find the real reason so you can fix whatever they think is wrong with you, and all just so you can have them.
No, you’re still not hearing what you need to hear from them. You try to go back to the innocent, friendly banter that you used to engage in before; but, alas, it’s all fucked up now. Things have changed. Maybe they didn’t like you creepily obsessing over them without just cause. It’s not like you had ever really shared any real intimate interaction.
No. As if the rejection wasn’t bad enough, dammit, you’ve already told all your friends that this was going DOWN—NO MATTER WHAT! Now you wish you would have kept your mouth shut. Only thing left to do is be a jerk about it, even though any embarrassment or hurt feelings are ALL self-inflicted. (Time to cause a scandal and play the victim just to save face.)
No. You thought all of the foolishness would have blown over. It hasn’t and it probably never will. You’ve ruined what could have been a cool friendship because you ignored the signs that clearly stated that your “Boo” wasn’t interested in you the same way you were interested in them. You try one more time, (just because you’re obsessive like that), and get hand-checked to the face—ruthlessly. Damn, it was all good just a week ago, wasn’t it?
WARNING: When a person wants you, they’ll pursue you or make it clear. That’s human nature. If you throw bait and they don’t bite, it is what it is. There is no changing a person’s heart when their mind is made up that they want no parts of you. There are no hidden messages in whatever they say to you out of common courtesy. There is no deeper meaning in that “LOL” they typed only because it would have been too awkward NOT to respond to you. Don’t get offended. Move on and find somebody that DOES like you like that. It’s not cool to get jealous and show it publicly when you were NEVER involved with them in the first place. Stop stalking, stop implying; shit, some people need to stop crying over something that NEVER EVER even existed! Seriously? Are you kidding me? Whatever happened to pride? I guess it’s hiding somewhere, right in the same bushes with common sense and rational behavior.
Written By: Keith Kareem Williams